I have had this question posed to me before from singles, when a woman who has slept with a man early on in the dating stages, suddenly discovers a week or two later…
Golly gee... why does this relationship appears to be only about SEX !
How did this happen?
Now don’t get me wrong, I am not passing any judgments here. We are all adults making our own decisions, my goal is to simply enlighten you of the consequences of your actions and how things will play out from that point forward. If you decide to go home and sleep with a guy the very first date or time you meet with him, you really have to adjust your expectations accordingly. You have just made the decision to turn this into a casual night of fun, or “hookup” as some would call it, and once you have made this decision there is no turning back.
If you get a second date, well then consider it an unexpected added bonus to the casual fun night again. Don’t ever think, just because you now have slept together, you two are now property of each other. The “hookup” will never guarantee no matter how good the sex was, that he will be calling again. If that’s your ulterior motive then you just set yourself up for a major disappointment.
I know… your saying it’s not fair!
Well I didn’t make the rules, and I have broken them enough times to know …they still do exist! And when you do break the rules, be prepared for what follows. Even though a man wants to get physical with you right away, and might even tell (or beg you) it won’t change a thing… that same man will be re-evaluating the relationship as soon as the light of day shows up!
They will always wonder in the back of their minds, if you do this with every Tom, Dick and Harry you meet? And you should question the same in your mind about him… is he with every Jane, Sally and Betty?
Even though it seems like a good idea at the time, and we all love instant gratification, the fact is, a man will more likely respect a women, stay with a women, and want to please her, is the woman that leaves him wanting more. When you hold back a little, that’s intriguing and something to look forward to. Become the object of his desire beyond the initial lust you both feel. THAT works both ways for MEN and WOMEN
If you goal is long term, then take my advise, and hold off, get to know him better, wait until you get the feeling you can trust him. Let him earn your trust firs t. You are worth it !
But end the first date at the bar meeting at the BAR, no matter how well it went!
Sorry guys, but I had to tell them. But you will thank me too when you meet the right girl Just think of all the drama I am saving you from those crazy stalking women that will follow you, if you go too far too soon, and then you decide you want to back out of the relationship!
Hey it’s true, I once told a guy that was practically begging me to sleep with him on the first date night “no thanks… one night stands are like having a Chinese food. It will leave you hungry an hour later.”
Go for the full sit down dinner, trust me it will always be much more memorable.
All the best on your quest!,